emo quote

it's hard to wait around for something you know will never happen, but it is harder to stop waiting when you know it's everything you have ever wanted.

--
i may get what i want, but they dont hang on for that long.

...

i miss the way things were.
of laughing with you.
and at you.

i
miss
being
happy.

0o0o0o0
that is why i dread going home
and my way to it.
because i get to think of all these things.

L-squared

i used to love departures.
i used to love the idea of packing up and never looking back.
oblivion.
letting go of the world you once were so used of having..'til you have grown too big for it. from everything twisted, there is an escape. from the suppresion of emotions, there is freedom. there is an exit. a breather.

but it is not how it works in real life. the heroine doesn't always have to be happy. exits may not exist. freedom may just be an illusion. and an escape may just be another of god's unanswered prayer.

i used to love departures. i hate them now.
i am insaned even by the slight thoughts of losing people and people leaving. of love persevering... but men changing. i have had enough relationship drama to last a lifetime and i should have mastered the art of leaving and letting go. but i haven't.

it is said that it's not what we hold in our hands that is ours. it is what is left when we open our hands and let go. but what if the one who got away was the ONE... if only we had enough guts to fight? what if we never get that shot at happiness again? what if there is nothing left for us to own?

leaving and letting go. two of life's hardest. i used to love them. because way back then, they were so easy.

nov. 10, 2007

congenital fantasy

-=-
all my life, i have been waiting for my lucas.

consolation

direkidt20: x nako gi ask out ko
kim_y8: ang salvadorian?
direkidt20: nope the one before
kim_y8: kinsa??
direkidt20: a mexican
kim_y8: kinsai mas love nimu?
direkidt20: patay
direkidt20: hahaha
direkidt20: <3
kim_y8: answer daun! ehhe
direkidt20: kimmm

kim_y8: hoi i miss u j**. i wanna cry
direkidt20: psh
direkidt20: shut up oi
direkidt20: I MISS YOU TOOO

oOoO
it's good knowing that someone loves you on the other side of the world.
but sometimes, i can help but feel alone.

hiatus

off to Daanbantayan to visit Lola

oohhh lala

sweet caresses
insatiable hunger for each other's skin
union of lips
and the
beautiful collision of tongues
embellished by impassioned domains


let us be..
like lovers,
master the art
of pickpocketing
in the dark

all made legal by age.
by being 18.

thus,
i am not anymore known as kimari.
i am now your inday stimulator.

stimulating
everything
and
anything in between.

oOooOo

writing is confessional

sometimes, we tell the truth out of weakness. we choose not to lie because we accept the fact that we are not strong enough to defend for what we have just created. some choose to write- to try to turn sadness into longing, solitude into remembrance- because along with the strokes of their pen come their confessions. comes the truth. and nothing more.

all love stories are the same

" if i choose to play the bitch, i could ruin hearts, complicate things, twist love and the life it claims to have. but if i choose to play martyr, many are spared but then, i'd be handing to myself my own guillotine. "

kisses under the moonlight
chained phalanges on long walks
silent hearts during routes on wheels
lol's and fixed gazes aboard 6cs

join with me as i say bye to everything we once called ours.
and to everything we thought we had.

dated: 09.18.07

sometimes, we cling to someone that much because we think that no one great will ever come up to us again. but it is not in holding back that we win.. it is in letting go. men are not supposed to be recycled. once thrown, once freed, they are to stay in the bins reclusion perpetua. killing all hopes of the possible resuscitation of feelings.
a thousand and one times, i wanted to pick up from where we left-- but a thousand and one times, i stopped myself.
goodbye, mister triangle. you can now go back forming hearts with her again.

Raindrops bang like rocks
On my windowpane
I thought they'd never stop
Never see the sun again

And I've been sleeping in
For way too long
Mmm, wake up, enough's enough
Yeah, those days are gone

I'm gonna throw out my raincoat
Mmm, I hope it's all right
Gonna go find me a rainbow
And hang it up in the sky
Blues pass me by

You left me a wreck
Just like a rusty trombone
But some things, they just sting
Enough to move you along, hey

I'm gonna throw out my raincoat
Mmm, I hope it's all right
Gonna go find me a rainbow
And hang it up in the sky
Blues pass me by
Gonna go find me a rainbow
And hang it up in the sky
Blues, oh

I'm not gonna wait around
I'm throwin' this old thing out, mmm, oh

I'm gonna throw out my raincoat
Mmm, I hope it's all right
Gonna go find me a rainbow
And hang it up in the sky
Blues, blues, blues pass me by

Mmm, I don't need those blues hanging around